Deep Looking is a tool or a technique of meeting whatever arises in the moment. It is a form of self-inquiry, a way of asking simple direct questions and waiting for an answer to come up. It is a method to uncover unconscious patterns and by seeing how they are creating suffering all that no longer serves gets gently released.
I love working with this amazing tool as it is so effective. Even one session allows a deep transformation to happen. If you are feeling stuck and don’t know how to move forward, you can use this technique to examine what is holding you up and free the stuckness.
The best way to learn this method is by having a course of sessions. Each session allows you to go deeper, to notice patterns that have been hiding. Having weekly sessions I can support you on your journey from tightness to lightness. Knowing how to meet whatever situations and emotions arise in a kind and loving way makes the whole journey smoother and lighter. This is a very simple and powerful tool, that you can apply in everyday living.
If you work with me, you can expect a deep transformation in how you see yourself, your mind, your heart and the world. Mastering this tool you will learn how to find peace, that is always here, only obstructed by continuous unnecessary thinking. Deep Looking is going to help you to find your balance, access your own wisdom and prepare you for living life fully, wholly and fearlessly. It is a way to find the joy of being and enjoying life.
When I first started using this technique, I did it by myself, but then I started practicing it with friends and people I had never met. It is amazing to see from the inside how the mind mechanisms work. The mind protects the heart. In this noble task it became confused, and suffering was created. Instead of looking for the root cause and releasing it, the mind created more and more security structures to protect the heart from suffering, and that only created more suffering. In the end, the heart may feel small, wounded, and helpless. All the heart wants is to love. It can love freely, but the mind keeps it “safe” from possible hurt. Sometimes it offers protection just in case, without examining if that protection works for the good or only creates more tension. The heart is at peace when it’s expanded, limitless, conditionless—when it loves what it loves and enjoys the feeling of it. If you listen to what your mind and heart really want, if you start to communicate with those two, eventually the knot will loosen and the tightness will melt away. What is left is openness and acceptance. Peace with what is.
“After ten years of shadow work and enquiry, I thought I was pretty much ‘done.’ Ha! Your clarity, realness and rigor had me see truth, and for that I’m eternally grateful.”
“I did a lot of Deep Looking after gating. I found it a really valuable method which brought about a lot of information, love and compassion. It broadened heart and perspectives. The one time you guided me, I remember, left me 11 hours!! sleeping afterward. Like a baby. A precious gift! It brought me so much understanding and self-love, and such beautiful images and connections with the child characters I encountered. I truly feel it enriched my experience and being and the ability to connect to people and surroundings on a childlike pure level of no expectations, no judgment, full of sincere, uncensored joy and wonder. And I feel no shame of that, no shame for such beauty!!”
“It was interesting having a Deep Looking session with Ilona. The inquiry is not invasive, and for me, was an opportunity to see the story differently. I have investigated the same story many times over the years, but this time without the stickiness of the “I”. It was a lovely gentle exploration into seeing what is, as opposed to the story. The story still remains, however, my point of view has changed from watching the story as a repetitive monologue, to watching with interest to how the story will unfold next – be it the same or different.”
“In our individual session, Ilona was kind and loving. I felt her interest and care as she gently guided me through the process of a dialogue with my mind and heart. She offers a process of deep healing!”
“I had a deep looking session with Ilona over Skype and found it useful in unbuckling some of the knots and the stickiness that was happening due to the unfolding and dissolving of this separate self.
Her very gentle and compassionate approach was exactly what was needed to allow the conditioning to begin to surface and be accepted and surrendered to.
As a psychotherapist myself, I see a lot of spiritual bypassing in the non dual community and it is wonderfully welcomed when Ilona and others take time to help the separate self in the way it needs before it is let go of.
I recommend her highly.”
“I’ve read about and heard Ilona on audio using what she calls deep looking some time ago and more importantly for the sake of this comment started playing around with it myself then. What’s been noticed over the months is that it’s been spreading like a soft wildfire in my system. It shows up daily, hourly even, and brings me these small spontaneous openings that sometimes surprises me in the most beautiful ways and brings me to tears. Doing the session with Ilona was like being handheld through it and amping up the focus and intensity for a longer period. I felt like I then couldn’t really communicate or even knew what was going on for me at all but it was all fine, I felt trust for her and what we shared. I can say that for me I’ve noticed that more in hindsight both doing this without and together with Ilona sometimes it takes some time to even notice what happened. Just like planting a seed, giving it water and everything it needs in one moment it sometimes takes a little bit of time for it to grow and express itself.”
“I recently experienced being overwhelmed and powerless in the face of extremely unpleasant thoughts and feelings that had been triggered by an uncomfortable social situation. Although the situation had happened that day, the thoughts and feelings were familiar responses to lots of similar past situations.
I told Ilona about this as it was still happening and she suggested that I was resisting feeling certain emotions and offered to do a deep looking session with me. I immediately accepted this offer and we did the session the next day.
It took an hour and the work was indeed, very deep, yet not difficult. Being with her felt so safe that found myself easily going into very vulnerable feelings and to answer very personal questions directed to my mind. my heart and my little girl memories. She gently guided me through tender yet powerful healing actions. I was so immersed in the process that it seemed that only fifteen or twenty minutes had passed when we were finished, yet it actually had been an hour.
At the end, there was no doubt that a huge shift had occurred – that there had been a healing and my heart had opened and expanded. I have felt more relaxed and at peace ever since.”
“Ilona’s Deep Looking sessions are really worth doing, especially if you feel that you have reached some kind of brick wall, with a loud and unhappy monkey-mind sitting on the top of it shouting about needing to worry or control. Ilona is great. Working very effectively using Skype, she will ask you helpful questions in a very kind way and in an atmosphere of deep respect. The heart succeeds as the mind becomes clearer. A kind of red sunset takes place. And it can go on for days.”
“Thank you, Ilona, for the deep looking session.
It is amazing how deep to the right issues it took me. You even have the perfect comforting voice, that helps to surrender to the process. It feels safe. It feels like walking hand in hand together a long way to the distant past. Then it is right here and now. All can be changed right here in this moment and let the past fade away.
I am so thankful for the help. It is amazing how one person can help to make a change to the whole life experience. It is priceless. It could be felt that you gave yourself completely into” my story and supported with love all the time. Really listening and choosing the right words to say.
You are a treasure. Love you”
Thank you for the meeting yesterday, it was a very special experience, and so far the change in perception of reality is sticking and is similar to coming out of long Vipassana retreats.
Truly amazing how simply and beautifully this works, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I will try to keep this brief but from the heart of the exact experience as good as I can.
Yesterday evening after our meeting I felt very present in the body, and movements of hands and body were more coordinated than usual, and there was no feeling of having to rush anything, I moved slowly and elegantly with easy in mind and body. It seems like the before omnipresent stress sensation of always having to be somewhere else than here and now is somewhat diminished. I laid in bed before sleeping and felt the bedding and cushions wrap around me like never before, really noticing the sensations, the thoughts had less of a grip on “me” and I slept very well.
I woke up with a tiny smile this morning for the first time in a long time, and instead of my meditation routine, I decided to just be aware of sensations and try to communicate internally with anything that needed to be seen and noticed, loved and accepted.
I have been able to keep that awareness very much all day, and have had moments of butterfly feelings by just watching my daughter, and even just sitting quietly and looking at objects has at times today brought some interesting sensations that I have never noticed before.
Anger, irritability, and confusion has arisen in the belly today, has been acknowledged and loved and have disappeared again before sticking around as usual for long periods.
Everything in life seems now less urgent and has less meaning and tension around it, like the attachment to outcome is less. I went through my facebook feed and unfollowed a bunch of pages with “answers” to some of all my searching and had a feeling I really don’t need that clutter anymore.
I also had feelings of more energy, and some restlessness came along with that, I sat with it and accepted that as well.
It feels like everything is the same everywhere around me, but the awareness has grown, and tension in the mind-body connections is less.. There is a growing joy in my being of feeling things and emotions more strongly, and feeling like being a part of life once again.
Tonight I will try some more Deep Looking and ask mind and heart of they are at peace, and see what answers come up – during my day today there has been more focus on raw sensations most of the day, not much inquiry about the messages the sensations bring with them.
I am trained in many modalities, healing, coaching, Chi-Kung etc etc (like most seekers probably) but I never felt the urge or interest in helping people with any of the techniques I have learned, it just seemed a little useless, like a band-aid on a big wound. I feel what I got from Deep Looking is completely different, and the only thing I would offer to anyone in the search for freedom.
I will be all ears and mentally noting how we go about with the process, and would love to learn more, and be able to guide people the way you have done with me, if that is okay with you of course?
Have a beautiful day
With heartfelt thanks and love”
Liberation Unleashed is a lively, fresh, and moving account of the author’s own searching, liberation, and transformation, woven together with the stories of fellow seekers and a clear exposition of the simple, focused tools you can use to go through the “gateless gate.” With its conversational tone, provocative questions, and the presentation of the seven steps—“Clearing the path—meeting the fear,” “Strip away ALL expectations,” “Get in touch with the real,” “‘I’ is a thought,” “There is no separate self,” “How does it feel to see this?” and “Falling”—this book serves as an introductory how-to guide, demonstrating how to use the process of self-inquiry to get free from the falseness of the separate self and realize a blissful oneness.
So many of us go through life feeling isolated, searching for ourselves, or seeking a more authentic reality through religion, spirituality, or other, more unconventional means of expanding consciousness. Now, with this book and its guiding principles, you’ll learn how to look deeply into the nature of self and existence; combat the anxieties, fears, mental blocks, and reservations that can arise in self-inquiry; and see the simple beauty of the everyday moment.